Hi everyone, welcome back! So far I have re-examined beliefs that encourage you to focus on what’s good in your lives. However today, I would like to re-examine what is it that we all want to have in our lives – the future! And I don’t think I am going out on a limb when I say that ‘happiness’ is really the goal that each and every single one of us seems to be striving to achieve. And in trying to achieve that happiness, a lot of us think that money and material success are the most important factors. So, here is my belief for this week.
Belief – If I can acquire X amount or lots of money and as a result all the nice brands and other material stuff, I will automatically be very happy and all set for retirement.
We all know that money IS a very important factor in living our lives while we are here on Earth. I am not even going to argue about that. However, how much money do we really need to live a comfortable life? May be you have a number in mind or maybe you don’t. Are there other things like spending time with your family and friends or spending time doing what makes you really happy is also on your list. Maybe you are one of those people who is already living a balanced life and you are somehow being able to make time for all of the above. Or even better, maybe you are one of those people who actually does what you love to do and make a living out of it. And in that case, I would love to congratulate you because you cannot be not courageous if you are doing exactly that. However, if you are one of us who is still stuck trying to live a life based on what the entire society places value on, read on.
Are you one of those people who thinks (like so many others) that being able to earn lots of money, ability to buy the fanciest car, wear the costliest brands, live in the biggest house etc. etc. is what will give you happiness as you go through the journey that is your life. You know, as I look back upon my early years in life, especially the ones where I was approaching college and it appeared at the time that my whole life depended upon which branch of study I chose; amazingly, it’s only now that I am beginning to realize that it wouldn’t have mattered at all what I chose back then because even if I had chosen differently, I would have still chosen based on how everybody else defined success. I would have chosen based on what everyone else valued which essentially is money and brands and nice homes and nice cars. And I am in no way saying that any of these things are bad to acquire. All of these things make our lives so very comfortable but my point is where do you stop? And the reason I ask you this is because when you are able to earn more money, own a nicer home, a nicer car etc. etc., there is always hunger for more and more because there is always someone else that you know who has more, is making more, doing more etc. etc. And we all know deep down inside that the reason we want to achieve more is to prove to the world and ourselves that we are better than others because we compare ourselves with others all the time. As a result, we get so caught up in working so hard in meaningless and stressful jobs just so we are able to achieve things that fit society’s definition of success and in the process we can’t find time to really live our lives and do things that really make us happy from inside. We can’t find time to pause and take a moment to appreciate the beauty of nature, listen to the waves of the ocean, spend a few moments in a day playing with our own kids, listen to their stories about the day they had, hold our partner’s hand or give them a hug…we can’t even find time for ourselves! And yet, somehow we convince ourselves that by working so hard, we are not just making ourselves happy but our loved ones happy too. But do you really think your loved ones will be happy when you are absent from their lives? Do you really think that this beautiful kid that you brought into this world will wait to grow older just so you can retire and then make time for them? That’s the funny thing about time, it waits for no one! And even though we all know that very well, we realize it until much later in life or maybe never.
Are you feeling a little guilty after reading this? If you are, let me tell you that it’s completely okay that you feel guilty because that means you have been thinking about this already. It’s just that you needed another perspective, another reason or a nudge to wake up and start implementing this in your life. So, where do you begin would probably be the first question that may come to your mind. I would say, wherever you think you need it the most because you know your life best. If you think you have been missing out on spending time with your partner, go home and just be with each other. If you think you have missed spending time with your kids, just go home today and put that phone/laptop away (after of course you have finished reading my blog :)) and just follow your kids lead. Your kids can teach you so much about what you have forgotten in life – how to have fun! If you think you have not been paying attention to yourselves, have a date with yourselves. Do what you love to do most. Don’t think too much about it though; just do it! Just do it because a lot of us tend to over-think and over-plan. The key here is to just be PRESENT..that’s all! I read somewhere a long time ago that PRESENT (to live in the moment) is called just that because it’s really a GIFT. A gift to ourselves, to our families and friends. So, even though we have 10,000 thoughts running through our minds most of the time, even though we have a long list of things/chores that we need to get done by the end of the day, what you really have to do is to prioritize. You have to prioritize whether cooking fresh food, if you are a woman who works outside the home a priority over spending time with your kids since you may only have a few hours or just a few minutes left in the day before your kids go to bed. You have to prioritize whether staying stuck to that company emails, even though you are officially back from work more important to you than catching up with your partner about what’s going on with them. You have to prioritize whether spending time watching mindless TV is more important to you than listening to your kids tell their own stories of how their day was and what was good about it or bad about it. You really have to learn to prioritize!! However, make sure that YOU are the one who is prioritizing and deciding what’s more important to YOU and NOT your family members, your well-wishers or anybody else for that matter whose opinions affect you! Because if you go by the opinions of others and prioritize based on those opinions, chances are you will be back living in your head again because you will be frustrated that you are still not doing what you want to do! So be very honest and listen to your heart. It always tells you the truth 🙂
Like always, feel free to leave a comment if you feel like leaving one. Until next Friday, live life 🙂